If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

That’s been my motto since I was a student at Bradley.  And let me assure you, there’s been a lot of destruction over the years.

Like that dot-com business my brother and I started about six years ago.  We had this idea that because we were in Peoria, we could help fulfill that need for people to “play in Peoria.” I thought if nothing else, it could be a good gag gift. If someone wrote a play, they’d send it to us, and we’d find a theater group to try it out, for free, and then we could report back it played in Peoria.  Or the same thing with songs.

We self financed it, which cost us about $4000.  $2000 from me, $2000 from my brother.  When our wives found out they nearly divorced us both. And then when we didn’t get any customers, things got ugly.  Especially when I told my wife we couldn’t take the annual spring trip to Jamaica.

So after a week of major cold shoulder, I found a way to find the money.  I decided to get a car title loan at Peoria Car Title Loans.  It was a stroke of genius.  We were able to take that trip as a way of putting the failed start up behind us.  I’m sticking to my day job from here on out.  Car title loans are a great way to fix a marital spat.

By the way Peoria is near Oak Ridge, West Peoria, Morton, Groveland, and Pekin.

I haven’t spoken to my wife in 18 months – I don’t like to interrupt her.

Which is why she doesn’t know about a little run in I almost had with the law. If not for some quick thinking on my part, I might have ended up at the Pekin Federal Correctional Institution. And then she’d REALLY have something to talk about.

I made a bad investment in a horserace. It was my cousin’s fault. I put $1500 on a trifecta in the summer and lost it all. And this was after losing my job a month earlier. So clearly things weren’t going well. And I did not dare tell my wife. So my cousin says he thinks I could slip into the back of his company’s loading dock area and steal some merchandise. He was thinking about quitting to join the Army, so he didn’t care. We talked about it for weeks because I had never done anything like this before. The day it was supposed to happen, I got real nervous and decided there HAD to be something else I could do.

Bingo — I found a legal way to get cash fast. It’s through Car Title Loans in Pekin. A car title loan is when you get a cash advance off the value of your car. It turns out my Chevy Blazer is good for more than that $1500, so I was able to get the money, and stay out of jail.

Wife never knew. She just kept talking through the whole thing and I never had to say a word.

By the way Pekin is near Crescent, Midway, Dillon, Tremont, and Groveland.