I have a theory that made my Catholic girlfriend blow a gasket: God did not create the world in 7 days; he messed around for 6 days and then pulled an all-nighter.

I should know.  I used to pull all nighters all the time at Northwestern and … well, my grades showed it.  And when I look at the messed up stuff in this world, I gotta wonder.

Take for example the economy. I got my degree in social psychology, and went to work for the state as a social worker. Golly, that was so not fun. Everyday, something depressing and the pay sucked. So next I got a job in HR at an investment bank that shall remain nameless. We spent weeks working on a layoff plan, super hush hush. I practically pulled an all-nighter working on that one. So Big Announcement day rolls around, and guess whose name is on the axe-me list?  Mine, of course. The worst part is I knew all the dirt in the deal, how the execs all had their bonuses protected while the little people were sent home with boxes of personal affects.

My girlfriend and I had just rented a bigger apartment, so this was not good.  Then I needed a dental procedure that cost $2300.  So where was the money going to come from?  My severance would just cover rent and food for a few months, but a guy can’t go on job interviews missing a tooth.  So I stayed up all night (just like always) and found on the internet Skokie Title Loans, a car title loan store.  Fortunately, my car payments were done and it allowed me about $2500 in collateral.  The loan process was very easy, and I got the money very quickly, in time to schedule my tooth implant for interviewing.  Now, if I can just get enough sleep the night before and don’t screw those up …

By the way Skokie is near Evanston, Lincolnwood, Morton Grove, Niles, and Wilmette.

I read an article that said that the symptoms of stress are impulse buying, eating too much and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That’s what I call a perfect day.

Ah, but the stress of job hunting and unemployment are starting to wear on me. A friend of mine was telling me that she was doing Botox as part of her strategy to find a job. I liked the idea, but didn’t think I had the spare cash for treatments. It’s about $500 in the northwest suburbs of Chicago, more downtown at some of the specialists.

I decided it was a $500 investment in getting a better paying job. So when I was looking at my reflection in the mirror of my car, all clean and shiny and paid for, I realized I was looking at my Botox financing. I had heard about car title loans and went online where I found Morton Grove Title Loans. It was fast, easy, painless and instant (money arrives the next day in your checking account). And I look fabulous.

Of course, everyone I run into in town immediate says I look so young and fresh. I love Morton Grove. It’s nice to live in a small town, because even if you don’t know what you are doing, someone else does.

By the way Morton Grove is near Niles, Glenview, Northfield, Wilmette, and Lincolnwood.

Evanston is filled with ironic intellectuals. My last boyfriend once said, “I can’t get enough of minimalism” and giggled about it for ten minutes.

Yeah, he was a real comedian alright. And he had a creative streak. He painted murals on the kitchen, bathroom and dinette area walls as part of his aspirations to become a muralist (last I heard, he took a telemarketing job in Niles). So after we broke up, I had to change apartments to something I could afford on my own. It was my name on the lease, so of course I was responsible for the security deposit. Well, when the landlord saw the murals he explained it would take a lot of painting to cover them up, and that my security deposit of $1500 was essentially out the window. So that then presented me with a challenge for coming up with a new security deposit on my new place.

Ever the resourceful gal, I realized my VW Beetle would be collateral in a car title loan. I was always creeped out by the kinds of stores where you would go for one of those, so I was heartened to see that car title loans can now be done entirely online. I went to Evanston Title Loans, where the application was very easy to complete, and I had my money by the next day – just in time to secure my new place. Whew!

Now, I think I’m going to date an auto mechanic or a plumber. Enough with the irony, a girl needs guys good with their hands.

By the way Evanston is near Skokie, Lincolnwood, Morton Grove, Wilmette, and Northfield.